By Michael Brendan Dougherty
Friday, August 18, 2017
There’s a mismatch between the political press and the
White House it is intended to cover. Political scribblers like myself are
primed to greet the news of Steve Bannon getting bounced from the White House
as an event with significance for the battle of ideas in the White House and in
the Republican party.
We want to say that Bannon’s a “populist” of some sort,
an anti-China guy, an America Firster. Heck, he even advocated tax raises on
high-income earners. And we want to say that his enemies in the White House are
either social-climbing socialites (liberals), generals who favor more military
engagement (hawks), or business guys who think government is here to goose
growth through interest-rate and tax policy.
And on some level, I’m sure that’s true. Supposedly the
White House is still setting federal regulations and encouraging certain
legislative items to come forward in Congress. But increasingly it seems that
judging the White House in these terms is like trying to determine the stock
price of different suntan-oil companies by following the ups and downs on
episodes of Jersey Shore. The
ideology is just the furniture and props that the characters throw at each
other in set-piece fights. Trade protectionism: a sofa overturned in a tantrum.
A vow to fight the globalists: a box of Valtrex fired across the room in anger.
Steve Bannon has vowed “war” against Rupert Murdoch, Matt
Drudge, and his enemies in the Trump White House. Sure, sure. Bannon claims to
hate the media, but he sure likes providing the rep-tie-wearing Washington
press corps with entertaining plot twists and new-season teasers. We don’t need
political writers to cover this. We need reality-TV-show recappers and gossip
columnists. We need WWE scriptwriters.
So here’s the next season of Populist Revolt, the new series on Breitbart.com and talk radio.
The pitch is “Let Trump be Trump.” Our merry band of editors and radio gabbers
are going to save Trump and Trumpism from the administration that Donald Trump
picked for himself. Will anyone notice that “Let Trump be Trump” is a stale
reprise of a 1980s plot of “Let Reagan be Reagan”? Probably not. Well, anyway,
Bannon is better at the stagecraft these days.
Maybe they can string this plot out long enough, perhaps
until the Democrats nominate their next presidential candidate, the next
globalist, cultural-Marxist threat to good solid American blah, blah, blah.
Then the producers of the populist psychodrama will launch the next season of Make America Great Again. “We admit it,
the first Trump term stunk. But he’s finding his political soul again at the
rallies. Look, he encouraged another fist fight! He fights!” Or maybe Trump’s
approval ratings tank enough and Bannon’s crew distance themselves from Trump
the way Sean Hannity eventually abandoned Arnold Schwarzenegger.
People who write about politics and have Twitter accounts
will continue to lose their sense of sanity trying to cover this administration
as if doing so gave them membership in a dignified profession. Being a part of
the Fourth Estate of a history-making republic seems respectable. Being a Steve
Bannon fanfic analyst sounds like something else.
Perhaps the decent thing one can do for one’s sanity is
to become a proper conspiracy theorist. What a relief it would be if George
Soros, Vladimir Putin, or the members of Bohemian Grove were pulling all the
strings. Who cares if they’re evil? At least they’re adults taking
responsibility for the world we live in. Until today I thought Louise Mensch
and other Putin obsessives were unhinged. Now I wonder if they aren’t pioneers
of self-care and self-help. If the world is insane, the only way to restore a
sense of balance is turn your own screws until loose.
Steve Bannon is out. Tune in next week for Steve Bannon
strikes back. You’ll be watching. Donald Trump will be watching. Are you not
entertained?
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