Joe Biden Needs to Stop Talking about Beau

By Charles C. W. Cooke

Tuesday, August 31, 2021

 

Joe Biden should resolve to stop talking about the death of his son, Beau. He should do this immediately, he should do it without exception, and he should keep doing it until the exact moment he ceases to be president of the United States.

 

At some point in the recent past, President Biden has been informed by his acolytes that he is considered an empathetic man, and, moreover, that one of the causes of this reputation is that he has suffered an unusual number of personal tragedies — including, in 2015, the loss of his elder son. Unfortunately, at some point in the recent past, President Biden also seems to have been told that he can reproduce that empathy at a moment’s notice with the mere utterance of Beau’s name. Since last week’s terror attack in Kabul, in which 13 members of the American military were killed, Biden has repeatedly attempted to use his own heartbreak as a shield. Addressing the massacre from the White House last week, the president described himself as “the father of an Army major who served for a year in Iraq and, before that, was in Kosovo as a U.S. attorney for the better part of six months in the middle of a war,” and submitted that, as a result, he had “some sense, like many of you do, what the families of these brave heroes are feeling today.” Biden used this line again on Sunday, while meeting with the families of the slain. He used it yet again during his victory-lap press conference this afternoon. And, demonstrating that it has now become an official line, Biden’s press secretary, Jen Psaki, used it today, too. On all four occasions, it was a deeply inappropriate tack to take.

 

What happened to Beau Biden was, indeed, terrible. But the comparison with the Kabul Thirteen is grotesque. Beau Biden did not die violently, in combat, while serving on the front lines in a foreign land, but of brain cancer, after a long medical struggle, in an American hospital. Beau Biden was a soldier who died too young; but he did not die too young while soldiering. And Joe Biden is not some powerless parent; as a senator he voted to authorize the war, and as president he contrived the plan that led to the failure that led to the bloodbath. At the margin, it is true that President Biden has “some sense, like many of you do, what the families of these brave heroes are feeling today.” But this is also true of anyone in the world who has lost someone they dearly loved. Mercifully, Joe Biden is not a Gold Star parent. Mercifully, Joe Biden does not have any particular insight into the experiences of Gold Star parents. Next time he stands at a podium, it would be appropriate for him to remember that.

 

As a rule, one should always temper comments made by people who are in agony. And yet, reading through the reports from Biden’s meetings with the families of the deceased, a definite pattern emerges. According to the Washington Post, the widow of Rylee McCollum was disappointed that Biden “kept checking his watch and bringing up Beau.” Mark Schmitz, the father of another fallen Marine, Jared Schmitz, noted that “it just didn’t seem that appropriate to spend that much time on his own son,” and recorded that when he suggested that Biden learn more about those killed, he was met with the irritated rejoinder, “I do know their stories.” And Shana Chappell, the mother of Marine Kareem Nikoui, wrote to Biden on Facebook “you tried to interrupt me and give me your own sob story.” There is, of course, nothing that Biden could have said to have forestalled some of the anger thrown his way. That, though, is no excuse for making it worse.

 

And, besides, even if Biden’s experiences were closely relevant to the topic at hand, he would still be obliged to remain silent about them while publicly mourning the slain. The appropriate way to deal with people who are consumed by anguish is to listen quietly and to absorb as much of their pain as possible. It is not to say, “You know, what you’re telling me about yourself actually reminds me quite a lot of me” — especially when you yourself are responsible for the death being grieved over. At present, Joe Biden is the president of the United States; he is the commander in chief; he is the guy in the room where it happens. In circumstances such as these, his job is to thank the families for their sacrifice, and then to remain silent while they say whatever they wish to say — however rude or frenzied or heartbroken they may be. Franklin Delano Roosevelt did not mention Franklin Jr. after the horrors of D-Day. Abraham Lincoln did not refer to Willie during the Gettysburg Address. George Washington did not invoke Martha Parke Custis in his speech at Valley Forge. And nor would it have occurred to them to do so. There is a time, a place, and an office for such things. And this is most certainly not it.