By Charles C. W. Cooke
Friday, October 24, 2014
Missouri’s Republican senator Roy Blunt spoke for the
angels earlier this week when he observed that his party is remarkably adept at
screwing things up. Responding to widespread reports that the GOP has a better
than 50 percent chance of taking control of the Senate next January, Blunt quipped
that “if anybody can mess this up, my side has the total capacity to.”
One imagines that tens of millions of heads started to
nod in agreement. When, last year, it became clear that 2014 should by rights
be a good year for conservatives, the more cynical among them began to imagine
that it was therefore about time for the party’s leadership to scour the
country in search of the most unlikeable, inadequate, unpredictable figures
that they could possibly find. Somewhere, I supposed acidly, there was a farm
that specialized in raising registered Republicans with incurable Tourette’s
and a penchant for ventilating on the subjects of rape and armed revolution.
From the latest litter would the party draw its candidates and, as in years
past, the rest would be history.
And yet, in this cycle, it has been the Democrats who
have repeatedly erred and the Republicans who have stayed happily out of
trouble. Thus far at least, there has been no Todd Akin to sully the GOP’s
efforts, nor have any of the party’s other aspirants served as lightning rods
for controversy or as exemplars of the asinine. If 2014 has taught observers of
the political scene anything at all, it should be that however ideologically
polarized the country may seem, candidates still matter — on both sides of the
aisle. In recent years, Bloomberg’s David Weigel has taken a wry delight in
appending an inappropriate hashtag to instances of conservative deficiency and
Republican dissension, sardonically marking the movement’s most egregious
mistakes with the words “#demsindisarray.” Now, however, many “Dems” really are
in “disarray” — the party’s candidates having stepped of late onto rake after
rake after rake. That, despite the frequency of their missteps, Democrats are
still in such a healthy position should worry the Right and thrill the Left —
if Republicans do end up taking the Senate, they will likely do so by a
whisker, and they will be unlikely to hold onto it in 2016 — but it should also
tell us that there is nothing written in the stars that guarantees that
conservatives must be incompetent and ineloquent. Maybe, just maybe, the
messenger matters?
Were an alien visitor to have descended from the heavens
in order to survey this election season, he would likely have concluded that
the American Left struggles to find proficient representatives. In Montana, the
Democratic party lost its first candidate to a plagiarism scandal and,
inexplicably, chose as his replacement an erratic Communist sympathizer whose
idea of a fun afternoon is to record and post rambling black-and-white videos
of herself to her YouTube page. In the course of her many “vlogs,” Amanda
Curtis has mocked women who believe that they will be given a chance against
sexual predators if they are armed; disdained “the family,” “natural law,” and
“Christians”; and confessed how difficult she finds it not to “punch” fellow
lawmakers in the face. She is currently losing by 19 points, and it is only by
the grace of pronounced media bias that she has not been transformed into the
public face of the entire party.
In Massachusetts, meanwhile, poor old Martha Coakley has
doggedly continued to be . . . well, to be Martha Coakley, with all that that
entails. Whatever it was that inspired the Democratic party in one of the
bluest states in the country to give the woman who almost sank Obamacare a
second shot, the powers-that-be will almost certainly now be bitterly
regretting their choice. Republican Charlie Baker is winning by nine points.
Even in the closer races, it is Democrats, and not Republicans,
who have injured themselves. Iowa’s Bruce Braley kicked off his campaign
insulting the voters of his state by loftily informing a room full of trial
lawyers that Senator Chuck Grassley was just “a farmer from Iowa who never went
to law school.” Later, visiting the state in support of Braley, First Lady
Michelle Obama repeatedly introduced her comrade as “Bruce Bailey” — even going
so far as to send attendees to the wrong campaign website — and then suggested
admiringly that Braley had been a former Marine. He has never served.
The hits have kept coming. Colorado’s Senator Mark Udall
has served primarily as a salutary reminder that too much of a good thing can
be fatal, his obsessive reliance on the “war on women” set piece having
provoked friends and critics alike to christen him “Mark Uterus,” and the
usually left-leaning Denver Post to have not only endorsed his opponent, Cory
Gardner, but to have accused the “obnoxious” Udall of lying, of “trying to
frighten voters,” and of running a campaign that represents “an insult to those
he seeks to convince.” His supporters have done little better. A hit-job on
Gardner put out by the sports website Deadspin in October was quickly picked up
by an array of progressive journalists and Democratic power players, all of
whom were forced to eat crow just a few hours later when the dispatch was
discovered to be downright false. Michelle Obama’s trip to Colorado, meanwhile,
was not a great deal more successful than her foray into Iowa. Stumping for
Udall, the first lady described the Democrat as a “fifth-generation Coloradan,”
and explained to the crowd that this gave him a particular insight into the
state. Alas, Obama had mixed up Udall with his opponent. Udall is from Arizona,
went to college in Massachusetts, and moved to Colorado as an adult; Gardner’s
family, by contrast, has lived in Colorado since 1886. The flub was evidently
contagious. Yesterday, Udall told his supporters that, in America “at our best,
we judge people by the content of their color.” Gardner is now winning by four
points.
Over in Arkansas, Mark Pryor has stumbled from mistake to
shining mistake. In the course of his bid, Pryor, who won his Senate seat after
his father retired in 2002, has accused his Iraq-veteran opponent of feeling
“entitled” to be sent to Washington because of his military service; has proven
incapable of answering simple questions about Ebola, despite having made the
disease a live issue in the race; and, rather oddly, averred during a debate
that the term “middle class” covers anyone whose income is under $200,000 per
year. (Not only is this definitionally incorrect, the median household income
in Arkansas is $39,919.) In and of itself, this lattermost claim does not
greatly matter. But mistakes tend to gain traction when they confirm the
preexisting conceptions of the electorate, and when they tie into current lines
of attack. As the scion of a family of politicians that has been involved in
Arkansas politics for more than half a century, one suspects that Pryor could
have done without the error. Similarly afflicted has been Louisiana’s Mary
Landrieu, whose description of Louisiana’s parishes as “counties” was innocuous
enough in a vacuum, but, nevertheless, played into the effective Republican
charge that she lives in Washington D.C. and has lost touch with the state she
represents.
Unforced errors have been routine. This week, North
Carolina’s Senator Kay Hagan simply refused to turn up for a debate with her
opponent, prompting mockery on both left and right. Awkwardly, the debate went
ahead anyway, broadcasting, in the acrid words of MSNBC’s Rachel Maddow, an
“hour-long conversation with just the Republican candidate on TV for an hour,
uncontested so [he] can tell you what he thinks without any time constraints
and without anybody rudely interrupting.” In her own unchallenged sit-down with
the Louisville Courier-Journal, Kentucky’s Alison Lundergan Grimes three times
refused to answer whether she had voted for Barack Obama, simultaneously
pretending that to inform voters whether she had cast her ballot for the man
she served as a delegate would undermine the “sanctity of the ballot box” and
informing viewers that she had voted for Hillary Clinton in the 2008 primary.
Quite the trick!
And then there is Wendy Davis, the Elmer Fudd of the 2014
cycle. As it has dawned on Davis that the excitement of the
social-justice-and-elective-eugenics crowd is not heavily represented in a
state such as Texas, she has become increasingly unhinged, not only drawing
gratuitous attention to her opponent’s physical disability, but refusing to
answer whether or not he was “exploiting” that injury for electoral gain. At
times, Davis has given in to rank desperation, stopping short of accusing
Abbott of wishing to bring back slavery — but only just. “What’s at stake in
this election,” Davis claimed earlier in the week, is an “interracial marriage
ban” and a “poll tax” — the former because Greg Abbott refused to answer
whether he would have felt obliged to defend one had he been attorney general
in the 1960s; the latter because Abbott supports the state’s voter-ID law.
Previously, Davis had rendered her candidacy somewhat pointless, caving on the
question of open carry, ruling out the tax increase that her supporters believe
is necessary to fund increased education spending, and even deciding late in
the game that she would have supported the law she rose to prominence opposing
if it had been superficially different.
To make matters even worse, this display has been set
against the backdrop of a president who will not — and perhaps cannot — remain
tactfully quiet for the good of his party. This has been a midterm season that
has lacked any substantial political debate whatsoever, the single theme that
has united the Democrats’ effort being, “I am not President Obama,” which
collective disavowal has evidently proven to be too much for our vainglorious
commander-in-chief. Repeatedly, Obama has injected himself into the fracas,
running behind the naysayers shouting, tears streaming down his face, that
“whatever they say, it is about me.” Reacting to his party’s insistence that
their Senate candidates were not running on the president’s policies, Obama
told a crowd in Illinois that they should “make no mistake,” because his
“policies are on the ballot, every single one of them.” Equally wounded by the
current crop’s desire to distance themselves from him personally, Obama assured
voters that, really, his party’s nominees were all “strong allies and
supporters of me,” “folks who vote with me,” and people who “have supported my
agenda in Congress.” And, earlier in the week, Obama explained that a Michelle
Nunn victory in Georgia would mean that Democrats would “keep control of the
Senate and that means that we can keep on doing some good work.”
With friends like these . . .
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